tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4633836557986489093.post2262664278311370408..comments2023-03-29T06:00:01.923-07:00Comments on When the Needle Is More Powerful than the Pen and Sword though Sometimes You Need Both!: LETTERS FROM A CONCUBINE/WHORE PART3, The Whore/Concubines Vision Works like a Prism into the Hearts of Humanity, through the Darkness and the Mask of 'lies of the angel of darkness', Which Beast Image do we Worship Jesus?Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4633836557986489093.post-72816507789953854932010-06-24T12:48:05.190-07:002010-06-24T12:48:05.190-07:00Mara, I think prostitutes are killed off faster in...Mara, I think prostitutes are killed off faster inside, than whores, that I do know,<br /><br />but they aren't killed off with Believing, they are loved, or that it Might turn into love,<br /><br />where as with the whore, which for me it started as rape, molestation better word for it, which right there, I immediately had my sexual self autonomy stolen and my body was not my own, it was my mother's. So yea...then with the verbal, and it was always the you want to screw him or you're a whore this and even as a virgin, [outside of her abuse] I knew I was a whore--and sure enough, my first crush, he tried to rape me, nearly succeeded, then my first husband/after I ran away from home, who wasn't a husband, just this older man I turned to, he let me live with him, of course I felt obligated, I did have a crush on him, he took advantage then beat me all the time, so much for saving my virginity for marriage, [which I did believe in God then] and then after I ran away from him, it didn't matter anymore, I was what my mother told me and I lived it...so you see, it's a little different from prostitution but not different,<br /><br />because the relationships I did get into, were due to economics, exchange, I didn't really love, I don't think I ever did really, a few I loved but they used me, so I guess, writing this out, I was a prostitute I just didn't charge hourly fee, which is worse to me because I wasn't even worth That much. Sad,<br /><br />but it's still different, from like a teen going into to survive or one for drugs or one who is forced, so yea, in so many ways it's the same, but in ways it's different,<br /><br />and because we are NOT heard, I think there is still a lot of not understanding even among women like me. There is a hierarchy even among whores/prostitutes/sex workers, and that all gets a tad confusing too, like how to explain the rage, etc., I don't think, I guess what I am saying,<br /><br />that our rage is identical, similar but also different.<br /><br />It's like we are trash, ok, and like, some of us trash, get used a bit more kind, or maybe crumpled and another burned or crushed, some trash might even be recycled a few times, more than other trash, but in the end,<br /><br />we all get thrown away....<br /><br />so in that, the rage yes, is the same, because the One and Ones who make us trash,<br /><br />all feel the same and treat us all the same...<br /><br />so then for one of them, to come [or the Lord of them all, though He may not do evil, he created evil and ordains this or that, for whatever Reason, to us trash we don't give a damn about the Reason, the damage is too far gone],<br /><br />and to come and say oh but you're a lady or you are loved,<br /><br />it's absurdity to me, to us, I think...Especially, when we are required to keep, putting out,<br /><br />that's the most laughable of all. So like, then it's the hearing, well it's different now, you're married, for Us inside,<br /><br />it's Never, different. No matter how much, they say they love us. Men don't want to see this, I think, often times, they don't care too, I also think, for them, it's like a badge of 'hey, I got the whore now so I'm so much better because I kept her and I turned her into a lady, so it's Still about the Male Ego, and the thing is, they are in ways, yes, worse than the Johns...because their lust, is no different,<br /><br />and the thing is, we, trash, if I can be honest, can see that in them.<br /><br />The Only reason, I can deal with Jesus, is that He gave His body on the cross for me, that's the One thing, that keeps me connected to Him, how He reached me, and it was yea, in His showing me, how He, suffered in the same b.d.s.m. type of way, for Me,<br /><br />why I can inner connect with Him, I cannot, with a man no matter what he would say and never will. And it's still hard with Jesus too... <br /><br />JaneJaneDoeThreadshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04214008105767162997noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4633836557986489093.post-29600091332296914522010-06-24T12:27:22.774-07:002010-06-24T12:27:22.774-07:00I have been dealing with these things for 40 somet...I have been dealing with these things for 40 something years, for many years I thought I was over all of it, I did, the whole goddess thing but for me, it was the Lie of 'well it's empowering to not care and to just not feel', because deep down that was better than feeling the horrible pain,<br /><br />so yea, come to think of it, when Jesus started dealing with me here, I like that woman, Did get furious with Him, still do,<br /><br />especially, in light of the fact that in the Bible, it says, He is Lord of all things, is the one who controls, puts us in this or that, so yea, on that, I had some real issues, still do, esp with hating Him, because with me, it started in early childhood, when I was not even aware of what a whore was--I was told, and treated and forced to hear, believe, that I was a whore.<br /><br />So, it's like, yea, I was born to be that, whether I wanted it or not...so then, like to hear others, or Jesus say you're a woman of God and it's like, you're a damn liar,<br /><br />and it Is cruel, it Is like a type of mocking, to do this shit, then to turn and say, oh but you're not this anymore or you're a lady,<br /><br />and to just think one can erase all that [and to think that one can say, Sure God, you put me into this due to your Lordship but Hey, that's ok, I'm just Fine now], yea, it don't work like that,<br /><br />and then throw love in there and I know, for me, many times, I just wanted to kill,<br /><br />so...yea I can relate, at the same time, seeing this video, makes me see Jesus telling me what this man says and I just cry,<br /><br />it goes back and forth...it Really triggers, in my marriage, there has been numerous times, I have hated God, because I see Him as the ultimate pimp,<br /><br />I know that's horrible, but that's truth. And when I read, or esp hear, anyone say, well God is in control and God has His reasons and that in me just drives me to all sorts of dark things,<br /><br />why I don't do the whole submission discourses very well, because it's Always, the John and the Prostitute for me...the being compliant, force or manipulation or inner force, for me it was an inner coercion even though against my true desire, if that makes sense? I guess I should just tell my story, it might make more sense...I was taught how to be a whore first by my mother then by men...I wish, actually I Had of been a prostitute instead, and charged money--rather than the slow evolution into,<br /><br />I think, for me personally, I would have come away less screwed up--but I am sure, they would argue differently.<br /><br />I'm still working through so much of this...<br /><br />JaneJaneDoeThreadshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04214008105767162997noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4633836557986489093.post-60379379903375441822010-06-24T12:18:16.664-07:002010-06-24T12:18:16.664-07:00"Does this song come close to expressing a wh..."Does this song come close to expressing a whore's rage?<br />Does it get anything right?<br />What does it get wrong?<br />Note: she is angry most with the man who can't see (due to madness) that she is a whore."<br /><br />wow,<br /><br />I don't even know how to respond to this right now, seeing the video, all I could think was that old man, being Jesus,<br /><br />and I saw everything she said, not just the whore part, but the sinner part...<br /><br />and how He saw her, righteous <br /><br />[see what I wrote today]<br /><br />so, uh, ok will have to absorb this one.<br /><br />I did read the story synopsis on wiki , I've never read any of his works, one classic author I haven't read, heard of, but not read, I think he really saw her that way, a lady, her humanity,<br /><br />she, could not, I think the rage is from the time and time and time, being ripped away, it does something to you inside.<br /><br />In all fairness, and I touched on this a bit in one post, I was not a prostitute, though I did similar, for me it was one man then later another man, not many men a day, and for me it was the lies involved,<br /><br />where as in prostitution it's [be it pimp or trafficked, etc and I think there are differences there too] the exchange of money and there may be lies of some men who Think they love her, maybe they want to love someone but she's not able because there's never been love, just rape, so the type of damage, though similar, is very different, in some ways, and I think this differs among women, why they get into that work, or how, etc., because each situ/person is different, the prostitute may come away with more sense of herself because her abuse Wasn't tied into Lies of Love,<br /><br />where as the whore, will give herself away/or be molded into to do so, due to abuse, wanting Love, it's not about money exchange Though it Turns into that, after enough damage is done and then she's to the belief that all she is is body so why not, so there is a process there, but my point is, with the whore/or what the world terms as a 'slut' today, the Bible used whore/harlot, the harlot was the prostitute, the whore was the one who would sell her self for love, power, whichever, she in fact I think is more demonized but Both, are in that place because of either force, sexual abuse/child abuse, lies of men, etc., so it's hard for me to explain, I guess the whore is psychologically coerced and the prostitute physically forced, or coerced/via economics, both used and abused by men though,<br /><br />so the anger I think is the same But also different. Does that make sense? The effects of disconnect are I know the same, the self image are the same though they may differ or manifest differently,<br /><br />and some of the acceptance and what I call 'false empowerment', that whole I'm really just a goddess that men love, is really a lie to deal with the reality of like this woman in video says, born on dung and died on dung, just dung to be raped and abused...so they create an illusion to deal--I have known prostitutes who do this. It's a mental survival,<br /><br />but whores can do this too. So--that man, crazy, could really be telling what he sees as truth,<br /><br />she however, can't see herself that way, because it's near impossible, I think it takes a lot of healing/deliverance, but That too, depends on what the Age is, of the woman when her abuse begins...<br /><br />I don't have answers to that one.JaneDoeThreadshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04214008105767162997noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4633836557986489093.post-79273604185784618432010-06-24T10:33:59.182-07:002010-06-24T10:33:59.182-07:00The musical is based on the Don Quixote story (guy...The musical is based on the Don Quixote story (guy who jousts with windmills).<br /><br />http://en.qikipedia.org/wiki/Man_of_La_Mancha<br /><br />She has just been raped and abuse by a group of men and Quixote wants to avenge her thinking she's his lady rather than a whore.Mara Reidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16385458933795539928noreply@blogger.com