Thousands of children are tortured and raped repeatedly in private run juvenile prisons...let's keep this in mind.


Women, need to realize, that the fastest growing population of the Prison SEX RAPE SLAVERY businesses is in fact, WOMEN. That includes, WOMEN JAILED FOR SELF DEFENSE WHICH IN THIS NATION, SISTER, WE DON'T HAVE A RIGHT TOO, we are not MEN nor ANIMAL, women get 50 to Life for Self Defense, against rape, abuse, repeated abuse and torture. Even for not dying while getting beat near to death, a man can kill or torture a child, and the WOMAN-MOTHER will be the one who gets the longer time in prison [if he even gets charged], AND IF the woman gets sentenced with mental health--she can expect to be Lobotomized by force.




Lately I've been contemplating the reasons for Spiritual Dryness and Desolation, caused by years of snake oil doctrines and ideologies and the internalizations of hatred, particularly womb hatred, a.k.a. Misogyny.

and numerous things have come to me, realizations while meditating on the Word or just through prayer, my chats with God, with Jesus, that the Holy Spirit brings to me,

and so I am going to write these down by Elements, beginning with WATER.

One of the first things God showed me in His word about How HE is also SHE, was through the many verses on WATER.  Now some may say, "Oh that's new age or pagan or what have you", you know, I DON'T CARE, I am so done with those doctrinal poisons that have been used to ROB people, especially Women from knowing the Mother Side/Feminine of and in God and so I won't even debate them nor attempt to 'explain' myself on them anymore--if people choose to see only the evil then I suppose that is what they will choose to do,

and besides, I often do not have words to relay so...I am just going to put here what I see/hear and well leave it at that.  So anyway, WATER, there are So many spiritual meanings to WATER that I don't know really where to begin,

but this one came to me, so I'll start with, what God showed me about why I was in a state of desolation and well, spiritual emptiness, dryness, and what I am doing about it.

I will begin, by showing this video--now it's a love song, about a relationship between a man/woman, but it can also be understood on some different levels, which I will get into after the video...

 The WATER runs dry--well what causes that?  One thing that God showed me, that I want to talk about today is that WEEDS rob water from plants and trees.  Now spiritually WEEDS can come from various things,

for me, there were several ways that WEEDS were sucking not just the WATER from me but the LIFE out of me as well, one of those ways was Negative Thoughts, especially traumatic memories that were like a Wasp's nest in my brain.  God showed me, in a dream, about these wasps and there was this voice, Use lemon to kill them.

So I one day, months later, recalled this dream and so I googled it and sure enough, lemons can kill wasps, it attracts them, but there are Also lemon wasps, or what they call, Gall Wasps,

gall in the Bible means bitterness.  Here is a picture of the damage they do on plant/tree branches

and I do believe they attack Lemon trees, anyway if you're interested in learning about these wasps, gall wasps they are called,  see link to photo:

Now as to how to kill wasps with Lemons,

So I asked Jesus, well then how do I kill these gall wasp nests in my mind?  With Lemon?  and it took me a long while to kind of figure it out...what He meant by that, and so mentally I began to learn how to imagine these little gall wasp nests that were there by the curses through death words by others [abusers in my life] and how to spray them/tear them down using either scripture OR thinking on Lemon like things....Lemon is a citrus, so I began to focus on things that pertain to the sun, happiness or happy thoughts, that then lead me to focus and think on the many numerous 'sun' type of things I remembered from childhood or from my life, and it took some time at first because I tend to be a seasonal person and Winter and Fall are my favorite seasons...there is reason for that though that I won't get into here,

but for me, reflecting back on 'sun' things, the summer/spring season were extremely difficult and even painful...ah, the Sourness of Lemons.  Funny how God works like that, in mysterious ways, but anyhoo,

so replacing those gall nests took some time, another verse that Jesus showed me was one of the 'treasure', an evil person brings evil treasure out of an evil heart and a good person good treasure out of a good heart--well for that one, HE showed me, this huge treasure like box, that I had all this dark, evil memories and words and sadness, and I could either keep that box or I could trash it and HE would give me another treasure box and in this treasure box He had me fill it up with all kinds of good treasure memories that I could recollect, now I had to have His help to do this you see because what those dark memories do is that they 

1.  cloud our judgment and our perceptions of our past and current life [and yes even future] and
2.  we forget the good things, or take for granted those small things that we may not realize are actually treasures from Him

so, over time I with His leading, began to collect all these little treasures from my life, like the ice-cycles that I use to watch hanging from the window after the first snow storm in TX where I grew up [yes it snows in parts of TX] and I remembered how magical they were--and how the snow sparkled like little diamonds, and I would imagine off and on how I was this beautiful fairy type of princess or in one imagination how I was this Russian princess with a red coat, dancing among the snow draped trees...or I was a spy in one, LOL,  yea that one, think I was a teen then and or maybe not, maybe that was back in the 90s but I remember walking one night alone and it was So quiet, snow draped and the reflection it was just like this magical world and I thought, yea a spy in Russia, LOL, hey what can I say I have one vivid imagination, how I survived childhood,

and who would have thought that it would be used by God to show me so much--but anyway that was one of those memories and then when I meditated on those numerous ones came to me that I had so long forgotten...and then WE started to build this huge treasure box that is now getting easier for me to go to and pull out Good and so me and Him are working on that together...

and what that does is that it builds Light inside you, because you begin to CHANGE HOW YOU SEE, 

another thing that God showed me was how dark memories can be those gall nests and how they distort Who GOD is in your mind.

One good example of this, was this memory I had that God was bringing to me and it was the first day of school, in this town that no doubt in my mind was clearly a stronghold place for the demonic realm [it's school team mascot was even Demons and believe me that town was Evil] but anyway--my Nana had given me this necklace, it had red, white and blue stars on it, you know the plastic kind that were popular in the 70s.  Well for me you see this was more than just a necklace because I wasn't use to love or being love and surely not haven anything Given to this necklace was my First memory of a gift given to ME in love, so anyway I go to this school and this girl looks and picks up my necklace with her hand and says, "What's this" and I told her, "My Nana gave it to me" and then she yanked it off my neck and it shattered all over the floor.  Why I have no idea,

but that was my introduction to school in this town and it never got better from that for the 16 years I lived there...and I remembered the PAIN of that mixed with the pain of the years of abuse and so forth--but for some reason That memory kept coming to me...Why God, why is this one so traumatic,

then one day, God said, "you know, she may have destroyed that necklace and that is what the enemy keeps, that gall wasp, bringing to you to destroy your belief in My love or in your worth that yes YOU are worthy to be go back, to that, now that girl may have destroyed your necklace, and you think that it destroys the love your Nana gave to you through that--but the LOVE was IN THE GIVING, NOT IN THE NECKLACE, see the LIE was that the Love was in that necklace and see THAT IS HOW THOSE GALL WASPS WORK, and then they build their nasty little nest in there and suck up the WATER and LIFE out of your soul",

and God said "the LOVE was in the GIVING OF THAT NECKLACE AND THAT IS WHAT I WANT YOU TO DWELL ON" and when I did that, when I saw that, really saw that, then I knew, the LOVE was still THERE, hanging around my neck...this girl could NOT take THAT AWAY FROM ME...because the Exchange of Love had already occurred"

that took a couple of times to reflect/ponder on that but when I got it in my Spirit then I got is NOT easy getting rid of those gall wasp nests because they are used to having their nests there and you really have to be persistent in keeping them out and keeping them from rebuilding those nests.

Another way that WATER is robbed from us, I have just recently learned or become aware of is not just by what we do or don't do but by how we hang out with WEEDS and sometimes WE MAY NOT HAVE A CHOICE IN THE MATTER,


so What to do about those darn pesky weeds that cannot be removed?

Well one day when I was thinking on how to battle the negative forces that for so long had held me bondage [those strongholds] God was showing me through animals how they defend and by stumbling on something I found that animals/reptiles in the desert not only adapt through evolution, etc., but they also have different WATER STORING MECHANISMS put there to get them through the Water shortages.

And God said "put this aside because we will be coming back to this one day" and well I suppose the time is now--but yea I remember reading how many of these desert animals and reptiles and insects will take water and store it in some of the oddest ways...and not only that but how they'll seek certain types of habitation that Protect water from wind, other predators, etc.  They aren't removed from the predators [wow that one just came to me, :) ] but they find habitation that is a safety refuge,

so like if one is living with a WEED that is constantly pulling up precious WATER that one needs to thrive, then like the desert animals one doesn't WASTE that WATER by getting into word entanglements with them which is what the enemy loves to do--he loves to get us into all these word arguments/debates/strife because they suck up LIFE energy from us--just like those negative gall wasps,

and since it doesn't always rain and sometimes there can even be a Drought we have to learn how to Reserve our Water.  One thing Jesus would often bring to me was "do not throw your pearls before swine, etc" that scripture and I often wondered on that one too--what does that really mean?  Well like many parables it can mean numerous things, depending on the context/situation,


and what is worse, they can use KINDNESS to lure you in...Proverbs talks about this, the book of Wisdom.  James talks about the tongue and Eccl talks a lot about the foolish who speak often--

putting all those together and God began to show me how there are many snares put out by the predators and predators can also be those negative things that pull us down, those Weights and Sins that so easily beset us Paul spoke of....and one way they especially pull/lure women is through using/targeting Loneliness.  Predators and abusers are notorious for this--

because they are WEEDS.  That is what they do, they plant themselves in gardens or near trees because they have no water/life of their own, and like vampires they suck the life and water out of YOU.  Sometimes you pray for God to just yank them out, and sometimes God showed me you have to yank them out yourself when they are Habits,

and then sometimes you learn how to reserve the Water that you have by not getting sucked into the old habits of learned negative constructs, behaviors and especially those learned by false doctrine and gender roles.  The more you reserve your WATER and Praise and Reflect on the good the most likely that weed will go lean towards another WATER source--and either leave you alone OR that WEED will just wilt and die.  Because your plant will become stronger and take over the garden [we hope, LOL],

ah well maybe something like that...anyway these are just some of the interesting things God has shown me through Nature, that really are just amazing jewels that yes are worth storing in my little [well it's not so little anymore] treasure box here...yea let me open this thing, 

and that's another thing, you know we have to Open that treasure box, daily, you know a treasure box just left there to sit well those hinges kind of get all rusty and well it can get kind of hard to OPEN.

So anyway so God showed me numerous things in the Bible, or Word, about Water and the so many beautiful things about this Element, that is so much a vital part of our physical LIFE as well as our Spiritual, the Living Waters Jesus said that HE know one reason I had so much depression, the Holy Spirit kept telling me to Drink Water, I am a big coffee/tea drinker which is a diuretic, it takes water away...

and for Months HE was telling me this and I thought nah that's just crazy then one day I was urged to look it up and SURE ENOUGH...there it was, our brains are made up of 80% water and with dehydration/serious lack of water can cause schizophrenia and major depression.  WOW, like WOW, you know,

so I learned to uptake my water and those scriptures in the Word, especially the OT really began to have far more meaning to me and Why those ancients had such a high regard and respect for both WATER AND RAIN...

which well, let's add a video, how about a RAIN DANCE

Now what many may not realize, these were not just Dances for the Dance alone, these were a Form of Spiritual the Great Spirit [we call God or Holy Spirit], and they had a very High Respect and Honor, as well as knowledge as to Where their Water source came from...

and in fact they Still do, one that WE could learn from...Elijah too prayed for rain, because without Rain there is no WATER therefore there is NO LIFE...

a human can only live without WATER for three days, maybe four, though I doubt it.  We are that dependent on WATER to live.

the Mother In God showed me how back in the B.C. times women [and in A.D. as well in many parts of the world] due to the types of labor they did were very connected with Mother Earth and with WATER...

we today with our modern conveniences have lost a lot of connection to the Spiritual connections to Water and to GOD, I really believe day when I was washing dishes, a job I often loathe, Jesus whispered to me, you TOUCH MY WATER EVERY TIME YOU WASH A DISH...

that blew me away because we or I tended to look at the washing of dishes as just this mind numbing brainless work that well, yea it is, it can be, one thing I always hated about it was that my thoughts would just scream and with OCD that is just a nightmare, OCD that was like a wheel sped up with the years of college/reading books, that I just couldn't shut off.

And that sucked up a lot of WATER too, I had to learn how to balance that wheel and how to slow it down, still working on that one...and how to get my thoughts onto Listening, rather than always 'thinking, always spinning like a hamster in a wheel that just goes round and round and not going ANYWHERE, LOL, this is where Nature too had So much healing for me and why I think God lead me too,

because in our world today another thing that sucks up our WATER is those wheels of invention, those material things that get our minds to just whirling and then we get to where we can't sit quiet and listen, even When we are quiet because we are so use to Noise pollution [that's a big one] and to interruptions and all those gall wasps and hornets of negativity that just pollute our minds/thinking and OUR hearts.

We so need the RAIN to wash all that garbage away....and one day while sitting in the bathroom, LOL, yea why not tell all eh, it was raining outside and I was listening and I heard the rain drops fall from the roof overhang and it sounded like these 'drums'...Ah, that's where they got the drums and the music to the Rain Dance, I thought...

and the crickets--the bells around their feet, crickets make that same Song...

there is Music in the Rain...if you listen, you can hear it...

now listen to this next video, see if you can hear the similar rain beats...

I will close with this, it's called Adiemus Final Fantasy, it goes with the photos I choose, the funny thing is I've never played this game [nor seen the movie Adiemus] but the artwork for ME personally, a lot of it has Personal meaning that I prefer to use and so when I was looking at videos I saw this, now it could be taken in various ways but for me they reflect to me the Spiritual Warfare that I have contended with and the dumping the doctrines/negatives that bring death and embracing LIFE through LOVE, and well I saw this one and didn't at first think I would post it, but then thought later, yea I would because it kind of, to close--to me, the little bubbles rising up from the water, though I would presume they mean the spirits of those lost, etc., to me they remind me more of all the beauty that for so long, was buried under the dark lies that God resurrected for or the various characters and their war with evil could take it various ways I'm sure...again I don't and have not played the game, but it speaks to me so I like to use it. :)

Peace, many Rains to you,