CONCUBINE/WHORE WAKES UP, IS DEBUNKING 'CHRIST' IANITY OR IS IT MEN'S IANITY OR 'CHURCH' IANITY????

PAINTING, "SORROW" BY VINCENT VAN GOGH--

What I look like, Sorrow, on all days, what I have numerous times tried to 'fix' with faith, with religion, with politics/ideology, with feminism, with Jesus, with imagination of Jesus, with scripture, with false hope--in Spite of Truth, that I am Poor, was born in poverty, abuse, horrid abuse, internalized hate and shame, sin because I looked for love and sinned in doing so, More abuse, more shame, more guilt, more trying to be good, more trying to NOT sin, more trying to Believe, more punishment, more abuse, circumstances Beyond my control, ALL NEGATIVE AND SUFFERING AND DEATH AND SOUL ASSASSIN and then NO LOVE in the Church, NO real Love anywhere, just a lot of

TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK TALK

about Love, what Love is, what Love is, what Love is, who Jesus is, who Jesus isn't, then

I go to the Bible--VIRGIN WHORE VIRGIN WHORE VIRGIN WHORE MOTHER VIRGIN WHORE MOTHER

the only FUCKING REFERENCE TO WOMEN--IS VIRGIN, WHORE, MOTHER [FOR GOD NO LESS AND ONLY IF SHE HAS SONS] TO THE NAMELESS CONCUBINE GANG RAPED, THE NAMELESS CONCUBINES WHO WERE SEX SLAVES FOR GOD'S MEN, THE NAMELESS GIRLS/ TAKEN AS SEX SLAVES, THE NAMELESS WOMEN SLAUGHTERED IN GENOCIDE--OLD TESTAMENT

THE EVILLLLL WOMEN WHO WORSHIPED QUEEN OF HEAVENS AND THEN WERE RAPED/GANG RAPED AND LEFT TO ROT AND DIE...

MEN ER

WOMEN WHO MARRY AND LEAVE FIRST LOVE [BECAUSE IF A WOMAN HAS SEX SHE IS ABANDONING GOD] IS 'DAMNED' OR 'RECEIVES DAMNATION'

MEN ER THOUGH -- TIMOTHY [BOOK OF]

MEN GO TO HEAVEN, BROTHERS, BRETHREN, NO LOVE BETTER THAN THIS, A MAN, QUOTE A 'MAN' LAYS DOWN HIS LIFE FOR HIS 'BRETHREN', NOT HUMANITY, NOT WOMEN, BUT BRETHREN...

SONS OF GOD, SONS OF GOD, BRETHREN, SONS OF GOD, ANGELS ALL MEN, FEMALE IMAGE OF GOD HAS NO NAME, NO OTHER MENTION OTHER THAN

MADE IN IMAGE OF GOD, MALE AND FEMALE

MADE 'HE' THEM

I mean, WHAT THE FUCK, REALLY,

more Sorrow, more abuse, because EVE, aka EVIL did the SIN, why she was lied to and took of that damn tree, that damn tree that the LORD GOD MADE, LIED TO BY THE SERPENT THAT THE LORD GOD MADE

but EVE, EVIL--IS DAMNED, DAMNED DAMNED--

WOMEN BE SILENT, WOMEN THIS, WOMEN WILL BE SAVED 'IF' SHE CONTINUES IN CHILDBEARING AND 'IF' SHE DOES THIS AND 'IF' SHE DOES THAT

MEN 'ER'

Like WHAT THE FUCK.....SERIOUSLY

So I looked, and Looked, at Ancients for answers and I looked and I looked and read book of Enoch [which Really condemns women] and then at the Catholic Bible--DON'T READ BEN SIRA--WOMEN, WHY WE ARE ALL 'TENT PEG' HUMPING WHORES AND 'EVIL' FOR GETTING ANGRY AT HUSBANDS WHO TAKE IN 100 MORE WIVES...

that's supposed to be the  Book of Wisdom, added to Eccl...

all Inspired by God though, you know, inspired by God through MAN, BECAUSE WOMAN IS EVVVVVIL

then the Gospel of Thomas, read that one today, oh gee That's nice, Jesus says, according to Him, that women will be lead by him and be turned into the MEN or LIKE MALE WITH THE 'LIVING SPIRIT' OF MALES AND UNTIL THEY BECOME 'MEN' THEY WON'T GET INTO KINGDOM OF HEAVEN

OK GREAT, SO I GROW A DICK, I BECOME AN ABUSIVE ASS, I WANT TO FUCK EVERYTHING THAT WALKS THOUGH I PRAY TO GOD TO FORGIVE ME FOR MY TEMPTATION BECAUSE THOSE EVIL 'EVE' BITCHES JUST CAN'T STOP TEMPTING ME, THOSE WITCHES

AND THEN OF COURSE I IF HEART IS HARD CAN BE ALLOWED TO FUCK/HAVE SEX SLAVES, CONCUBINES, MORE THAN ONE WIFE, I CAN THROW MY DAUGHTER OUT TO BE GANG RAPED TO SAVE MY 'BROTHER'S ASS' BECAUSE I SO LOVE DE BRETHREN AND BESIDES, SHE'S AN EVIL EVE BITCH ANYWAY

AND BY GOLLY I'LL BE OK IN GOD'S EYES BECAUSE I AM

MAN....used to be Female but now I'm TOTALLY MAN BABY...ALL DICK AND SACRIFICE AND THE WHOLE BIT

then of course Anything goes wrong with my kids, they misbehave IT'S MY FAULT, BAD MOTHER, EVIL WOMAN, I DON'T DO THE PATRIARCHY RIGHT, I DON'T MOTHER RIGHT, I GO TO WORK AND I AM BAD MOTHER BECAUSE I AM NOT FOLLOWING GOD'S ROLES, I DON'T GO TO WORK I AM A LAZY PARASITICAL BITCH, I REBEL BECAUSE I'M TIRED OF DOING ALL THE HOUSEWORK AND I'M A NEGLECTFUL LAZY BITCH

AND ALWAYS, A WHORE

and I go to God and it's be patient and know that THE MEN...BRETHREN, ARE LOVED BY GOD--AND IN REVELATIONS, IT'S THE SONS OF GOD AND THOSE HOLY MEN WHO DO NOT DEFILE THEMSELVES BY TOUCHING

OH MY GOSH, AN EVIL 'EVE' WOMAN

AND THE WOMAN IS CHURCH [ALL MEN] AND THE WHORE IS THE OTHER WOMAN

I mean, Good grief,

so I DOUBT AND I CHALLENGE AND I ASK GOD THEN MORE PUNISHMENT COMES MY WAY--OH YEA BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DOUBT [HELL] AND YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO FALL AWAY [HELL] AND YOU'RE TO OBEY AUTHORITIES AND IF THAT MASTER TELLS YOU TO FUCK HIM WHY BY GOLLY BE HOLY, CHASTE AND PURE BUT OBEY WOMAN-- IF YOU DON'T [HELL] AND IF YOU WALK AWAY [HELL] AND IF YOU DON'T [HELL ANYWAY CUZZ YOU'RE EVE--EVIL] AND NOT GOOD ENOUGH [HELL] AND NOT STRONG ENOUGH [HELL]

AND YOUR PRAYERS ARE NEVER ANSWERED [DIDN'T BELIEVE ENOUGH, DIDN'T PRAY ENOUGH, DIDN'T OBEY ENOUGH, DIDN'T DIDN'T DIDN'T BUT REMEMBER, IT'S ABOUT 'GRACE' AND IT'S ABOUT GOD LOVES YOU]

BUT THE CHURCH--MEN ABUSE THEIR WIVES, DAUGHTERS THEY RAPE, SISTERS THEY HATE

BUT GOD LOVES ME...OH YEA, DO NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S PROPERTY--THY BROTHER'S, PROPERTY, WIFE, CONCUBINES/SEX SLAVES/MAIDENS [SLAVES AND SEX SLAVES] AND COWS AND OXS AND CARS AND HOUSES...

but WE CAN HAVE A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS, THE MAN, BECAUSE ALL THOSE WOMEN YOU SEE

ONE AT THE WELL--NO NAME
THE BLEEDING PROFUSELY--NO NAME

MARTHA AND MARY, THEY HAVE NAMES--WE NEVER HEAR FROM MARY AGAIN AFTER SHE IS TOLD IN ONE BOOK [ONLY ONE] TO GO TELL THE 'BROTHERS' HE IS RISEN

THE NEW TESTAMENT HAS HOPE, FOR WOMEN--SOME, UNTIL REVELATIONS,

WHAT GIVES THERE?

I tried to live my life being a sweet submissive [and of course that made it easy for men to Prey on me added to all the Abuse in my childhood--you know Whore, Devil's Child, Liar, Thief and sure enough--I became all that was pounced into me from infant age] woman, even SAVED MYSELF [excluding being molested/raped] as a Virgin and my first husband, beat the SHIT OUT OF ME FOR THAT GIFT,

OH YEA BABY--THEY LOVE THE BLOOD, THAT WHOLE BLOOD MARTYR PAIN THING--FOR 'EVE' THE EVIL

I mean--yea...men beat their wives, WOMAN'S FAULT, men rape women, WOMAN'S FAULT, and men kill women, WOMAN'S FAULT

and then GOD loves the SONS OF GOD---THE SONS, BRETHREN, BROTHERS...

AMEN BROTHER

I've had it, I've had it Up to Here, I've Had it with imagining a Kind loving Jesus/God to Women when the whole BIBLE IS NOTHING MORE THAN A MISOGYNIST CODE BOOK,

I am tired of believing when ALL I GET IS EVIL MY WAY

I am tired of Seeing Good kind Christian women who Unlike me were NOT whores, and they Did serve and they Did obey and they Did submit

and they are treated like SHIT AMONG THEIR BRETHREN AND THEY LOOK FOR LOOP HOLES AND THEY TRY TO BELIEVE

AND THERE IS NO FRUIT--NONE, NADA, NEVER HAS BEEN AND NEVER WILL BE--BECAUSE I'M BEGINNING TO WONDER

IF IT'S JUST ALL MALE BULLSHIT TO BEGIN WITH.

Males who made up God to Justify their Rape, Pillaging, War, Conquest and Raping/children/enslaving Women.

Men like Gilgamesh and Kings and Strong Brutes who made up a God so that they can force that little ten year old girl to suck their dicks...

Romans who with their pantheon Gods and Goddesses [all who btw, in All goddess religions, demand the Prostitution and Sex services of Girls and Women] and the Greeks

who Interestingly--had Monogamy [prior to Jesus] and who Hated women and who were all into that whole

BROTHER LOVE THING...OH YEA--ESPECIALLY YOUNG BOYS

where it All begins--Catholic Priests and the Canon, Nicene Creed written WHEN?????

300 YEARS AFTER THE DEATH OF JESUS CHRIST?????

like WHAT THE FUCK---I AM, AN OPPRESSED WOMAN NOT BECAUSE OF MY FAITH BUT BECAUSE OH MY GOSH,

I GOT THAT EVE EVIL 'LABIA AND VAGINA' THING HERE, I MIGHT JUMP ON A TENT PEG...THOUGH IF MEN DO, WHY IT'S THEIR GOD GIVEN GIFT TO SPREAD SEED AND TO HAVE A QUIVERFULL AND TO BUILD A 'NATION' BY GOLLY

trying to BELIEVE ALL THIS AND HANGING ON--

TO WHAT?????? 

The ONLY thing I can believe, is the Cross--That is the ONLY GOOD THING THAT IS WORTHY TO BE KEPT IN THE ENTIRE GOSPEL,

IS THE CROSS, THE REST--CAN GO TO THE TRASH FOR ALL I AM CONCERNED

BUT, IF I TRULY AM HONEST--AND LOOK AT THE BIBLE--THE CROSS DOESN'T EVEN APPLY TO ME--ONLY TO

THE BRETHREN, BROTHERS, MEN

so, why am I even bothering?

Hell if I know, I am not going to Denounce Jesus--or the Gospel, but I AM going to begin to Debunk and look at the Other critics of Christianity because there is just Too much, WaY too much, that just doesn't line up,

and besides, my prayers are NOT answered, except in MY HEAD---and well I could have IMAGINED ALL OTHER BELIEFS TOO--

though I have seen paranormal 'evil' things but you know, I am beginning to wonder, If we are pumped with SO MUCH NEGATIVE ENERGY--CAN WE THEN PRODUCE EVIL PARANORMAL IMAGES/THINGS?

and What if, God really IS JUST

LOVE

NOT A BEING, JUST LOVE

AND WHAT IF, IT'S REALLY JUST ABOUT ENERGY?

POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE--WHAT IF?
I find it Amazing
that the ONES who actually

LIVED A PEACEFUL, SOMEWHAT, HARMONIOUS LIFE, WHO WERE NOT 'VIOLENT' WHO WERE NOT ABUSIVE OR IMPERIALIST WHO RAIDED OTHER LANDS WITH RAPING, GOLD MINING, KILLING AND GENOCIDE

WERE THE NATIVE AMERICAN INDIANS...I FIND IT AMAZING THAT THERE ARE STILL PEACEFUL TRIBES TODAY THAT DO NOT ABUSE THEIR WOMEN NOR DO THEY ONLY HAVE A 'MALE' GOD--BUT A MATRI SYSTEM--BOTH MALE AND FEMALE

I FIND IT AMAZING THAT THE NATIVE INDIANS DID NOT GO FOR THE WHOLE IDOLS THING--

AS FAR AS DESTROYING THE PLANET GOES [though some yea had totem poles and all that]

I find it amazing--really, that of all the people, with all the persecution and garbage, THEY STILL HAVE

LOVE

I'm going to Find the answers--if it's the Last thing I do, Until then, I am debunking...

and This, makes Sense.  A LOT OF SENSE--WHICH, IS THE SADDEST, SORROW OF THEM ALL...





THINKING CRITICALLY NOW,

JANE